We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
