I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
