just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Bring me that man meat
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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