i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
