Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
