Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
