I think I won the penis lottery.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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