There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
he shaved USA in his pubs
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
