we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
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