i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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