she looked like the bat from fern gully.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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