he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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