Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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