apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
