So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
