at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
We need to rekindle our bromance
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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