sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
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perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
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