windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
