u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
