Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
