he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Randomize
