her facebook's as public as her vagina
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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