Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
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