i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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