how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize