All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
