saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
