I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
