There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
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