My friends, they love my intelligence
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
