You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
