I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
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