i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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