They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
