In the future we'll all be gay
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
