We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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