was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
