see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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