she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
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