You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize