I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Randomize