Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
