All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
