Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
