Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
