omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
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