For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Randomize
