i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize