He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
