listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
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