can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I'm not coming to work today because tequila