Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.